Carpathian Forest - Fuck You All!!!! - Season Of Mist  2006
10 Songs
Running Time: 46:18 

Talk about back to basics. On this, their fifth full-length obliteration, Carpathian Forest is amped up, angered, and ready to do some severe damage.

Opener "Vi Apner Porten Til Helvete" is a crusted, chainsaw-wielding slaughterfest just as bred on Samhain as Hellhammer, which eventually slows to a mind-numbing crawl with Nattefrost puking up his festering innards with appropriate glee. Ending with gallop that could belong to Motorhead were it not for the sheer Scandinavian frigidness of it all, "Vi Apner..." bleeds out into "The Frostbitten Woodlands Of Norway". Drums that sound like Satan farting out a "Thank You" note to Carpathian Forest. Shrieks rip through the wasteland, Tchort and Bloodperverter's guitars whipping through the eardrums with annihilating skill in this hymn to winter. "Start Up The Incinerator (Here Comes Another Useless Fool)" is vindictive as fuck, a major selling point of CF being that they're so damn skilled at sounding like a troop of gorillas who broke into a band's practice room and making it work in their favour. Everything's falling apart musically, and when it isn't, the band's battering you left and right like your skull was a brain pinata on Cinco De Mayo. A. Kobro's racing drums fuel "Submit To Satan", CF winning humour points for tossing a silly-ass classic rock wankmetal solo into the middle of all this sonic devastation. Take Ministry's Psalm 69, roll it around in the ashes of a burned and desecrated women's lavatory, cover it with blood and shit, then call it a Carpathian Forest song, and you have some idea of the grimy thrash and bludgeoning riffs of "Diabolism (The Seed And The Sower)". Ever continuing to fuck with the masses, "Everyday I Must Suffer" is damn near blues rock. If Satan drove a tractor, he'd be blasting this song and mowing down souls at harvest. Disgustingly broken and out of joint, but better because of it. When Carpathian Forest locks onto a groove, they stick with it, turning it inside out, then flinging the whole stinking mess back into your face. Returning after a short hiatus Nordavind adds his own personality to this roadhouse-from-Hell number. You can almost imagine the band on stage behind chicken wire and Patrick Swayze kicking ass in the background. Lurching crawl covers "The First Cut Is The Deepest" and its crippled stomp, like the stagger of a just-reanimated corpse. Thank Goat this isn't a cover of the Cat Stevens song by the same name, because somehow I don't see the puking, wretched snarls of Nattefrost doing the writer of "Cat's In The Cradle" any favours. Winding down the album, "Evil Egocentrical Existincialism" is full of midpaced mangling, Carpathian Forest still managing to sound about half a measure from the whole thing crumbling into a pile of smouldering rubble, but they hammer through somehow...just as always.

For around sixteen years now, Carpathian Forest has gone through their share of sonic morphisms, each for the betterment of their sound and to the detriment of the music-buying public at large. On Fuck You All!!!!, the band yet again manages to deliver another (in)credible set of hungover hymns to suicide, Satan, and sexual misanthropy. It's like of like Marquis de Sade in a bullet belt.

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